Relax and enjoy this soothing post about organic honey face masks

"With honey facemasks, you know that you will have nothing but good results since honey is all-natural. There is no need to worry about burns from harsh chemicals or products that hurt the environment. If it is good enough to eat, it is good enough for your skin. Apply the facemask two to four times a week and you will have soft glowing skin that you will simply love before you know it."

Aw, that sounds like such good advice. And from such a nice little source, too. Don't you feel more WHOLESOME just reading it?

Let me tell you what would happen if I wore an organic honey face mask for even the minimum 20 minutes that this site recommends.

1. Within 5 minutes I would look like a Wookie because of the coonhound hair drifting lushly through the air of this entire bungalow.
2. The fruit flies swarming in the kitchen would hear the dinner bell and then I would look like a Wookie with hygiene issues.
3. Kid would take this opportunity to sneeze wildly into the air in my vicinity. Unclean snot Wookie.

I could go on and on. Give me the nasty chemicals that are applied in the shower any day. I might be burnt and poisoned but altogether I think that might be a better look for me.