Monday, May 14, 2012

WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY!

Things I learned today:

1. Never give up with the plunger.
2. Snake bites hurt, even if (especially if) given by smallish but fierce little people disappointed about television.
3. The time lag between my snapping someone's head off and their unwise decision to say even ONE MORE WORD about the amount of liquid that the very expensive organic chicken breasts have given up, even if it is a sign that they have been previously frozen and a practical guarantee that they will be tough: 3 seconds. I am nuclear powered!
4. A child can weep for a toy that was "disappeared" four years ago.
5. A farting foxhound does nothing to alleviate tension in a room in which a child is weeping for a long-lost toy and a spouse is kvetching about meat products purchased by a FREAKING VEGETARIAN, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHAT DO YOU EXPECT.
6. Ahem.
7. A plane from Calgary International Airport leaves for Barcelona at 11.47 this evening.

Meet me at the gate?

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