Monday, November 8, 2010

Gift Ideas

I'm not a rich woman. Well, yes I am, "in all the ways that really matter," etc., etc., --BUT I don't have so much money that I can spend it on gifts for people I've never met but still really like. Kid keeps asking for "food," which is totally annoying.

But here are things I would buy the people in my life, whom I have never met, if I could:

There are many things ironic about this button. One: its price--isn't it ironic that. . . . . nope, not going to do that. That leads to Alannis and April Wine and nothing else good. Leave it at this: I would buy it in platinum and diamonds for you if I could, if only for Whiteboard Wednesdays, which have let me know that I am not alone.

For Jenny, The Bloggess:
I would like to see where these would end up: inside an alligator vagina? I'm not Neil Gaiman but one day I hope to meet you, put on some wigs, take some Xanax, and talk about taxidermy.

To Unknown Mami, I would like to present this:

Unknown maybe, Mami, but not in a brown paper bag. You. Are Fabulous.

SubWow, thanks for visiting, thanks for the comments, thanks for the laffs. You really do have a heart of gold:

Also black, crimson and looks like some pewter. All those things.

Emi, I want you to have sunshine and fruity cocktails at some point this long Swedish winter, so if I could, I would send you here for two weeks--with a nanny:

It's in Belize.

It's a big world out there; some of you are in my neighborhood, or at least on my continent, and some of you aren't. But almost every day you make me feel like we're sharing a coffee over the fence. Thanks for the gifts.

Worn Ragged


  1. Thank you.

    To say any more will cheapen your present. So I will leave another comment to make you laugh.

  2. (I think I am suffering from performance anxiety: I can't figure out how to turn this into a funny comment. The problem is when I am not funny, I am either sappy or outraged... I will do sappy of course in this case...) I envy your talent in finding perfect gifts that say a lot to/about the receivers. I appreciate the sentiment very much. Thank you. xxoo

  3. How thrilled am I to get this virtual present!!! You put a huge smile on my face and that is the best gift I've gotten all day. You rock!

  4. Awww...I'm laughing and smiling, which is the best combo ever! Thanks for the virtual-osity. And for reminding me I need to to a Whiteboard Wednesday post.

    Since we're both in Cowtown, we should do a meet up!